By Yasmeen Finjan
As if teenage life isn’t unstable enough, throwing a relationship in the mix can make them all more difficult. I know many people expect that they’ll find their soul mate, their “other half”, and together they will float away on a fluffy cloud until they reach the land of perfection. When you are young, relationships can simply make you drop everything else in your life to reach that unachievable goal. You say to yourself that when you grow up, you’re going to marry them and you’ll be together for eternity. Living in the world of your imagination is a great feeling but when things get bad, they really impact your life.
At times, I can easily attach emotionally to others because I like the companionship. However, when that is gone, everything crumbles and I’m left scrambling. At times when I am not in a relationship, I become closer with my friends and with myself. I build myself up both emotionally and physically.
I’ve been in a couple of long-term relationships, and I am in one currently. My last relationship was long distance at one point. Without a car, it can be even more challenging. The lack of face-to-face contact can be more difficult to make the relationship pull through. Also, if you’re forced to use other means of communicating for the time you and your partner are seperated–like text messaging– forget about it. Texting is a really lousy way of communicating, especially when people use sarcasm or are simply joking. You can’t change your tone, so arguments easily arise when you rely simply on texting.
I’ve noticed that people my age tend to be very fickle about relationships and crushes. One week you’re digging one person, and then you meet someone else and fall head-over-heels for them. Then that fateful day comes where you and your first love part ways and you think that everything is over. I can sometimes push relationships way too quickly, and they get serious before I’ve really had the chance to get to know them. However, as I get older, I’m slowing down more, and seeing every situation as a small piece of my entire life.
Yet, it’s only the beginning. We will have relationships with many people in our lifetime. They will come and go for an assortment of reasons. All that matters is the person we are afterward. Although it is great when we are changed for the better, but loved ones can sometimes influence us to be people whom we wish we were not.
My view on relationships can be rather negative at times because I’ve had more negative experiences then positive ones. But once you find someone who does stick, it’s really great. There’s nothing greater then a best friend and a lover, all in one.
A lot of people won’t accept the possibility of two teenagers being in love. They’ll say that we don’t know what love is and that we’re just caught up in the moment. However, if you can love your friends and you can love your family, you can love others too. I do agree that love is an overused, overrated word and that it’s a verb –if anything. You should show that you love others through action, not just by saying it. But any time I’ve used the word love, I know that I’ve felt it for real. And love doesn’t just simply vanquish when the relationship ends. Sometimes the meaning just changes. You love them in other ways and you still hold the memories you spent together close to your heart.
Whether the idea of being romantically involved has you jumping for joy or running away in horror, the experiences that we go through help us to better understand ourselves and help us to draw boundaries in the way we allow others to treat us. Lover or hater, allow yourself to get tangled in another and see where it may lead you. You might just like it.
Last 5 posts by Yasmeen
- The Giver - March 15th, 2010
- Trey Ignored the Critics as She Made Her Way to the Top - October 15th, 2009
- Dream and Let Dream - July 16th, 2009
- Getting the Most Out of High School - May 15th, 2009
- Anime Antics - April 15th, 2009
