The Anti-Valentine’s Day Hit List

By Jennifer Finjan

We all know people who loathe the idea of Valentine’s Day. The pressure of providing that perfect combination of gifts and praise as dictated by Hallmark and ravenous retailers. I am not one of them. In fact, the more someone wants to show me they care through acts of kindness and presents, I say bring it on – the more, the better. Like many of you out there, my problem with Valentine’s Day is due to my ill-timed status and the unlikelihood that I will be reaping in its rewards. I feel like that kid in elementary school with the empty valentine’s box. It’s a sad state of affairs.

So here we are in February – alone, cold, and bored. So what are we to do? Our first gut reactions might be to go buy as many cheap bottles of wine our handbags can hold and wallow in self-pity until rickets and cirrhosis set in, or gorge on every flavor of ice cream known to man until we lose consciousness, or perhaps fixate on World of Warcraft until our real life friends come to our aid in the form of an intervention. We may even reach the lowest form of self-hatred by calling an ex for a little been there, done that.

Might I suggest some healthier, more progressive alternatives? I compiled a list of full-day and night-long activities that will not only occupy your time but also pacify your mind, body and soul – at least until spring. Who knows, you might end up having a great time and actually meet some interesting people along the way.

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We are lucky to have our very own world-class art gallery, AGO, yet so many of us have yet to walk through its doors, especially since its impressive transformation. It is a steal at $18.00 for adults (free on Wednesday nights) and will entertain you for hours as you discover its many treasures. When you’re done exploring, don’t forget to buy yourself a present from shop AGO. While in the area, why not walk over to Kensington Market with your digital camera in hand and conduct your own photo shoot. If photography isn’t your thing, visit Gwartzman’s

art supply store on Spadina and pick up a painter’s starter kit and a canvas notepad. It’s a great way to express yourself and it will not cost you a fortune.

Lady/Lad of Leisure

You deserve to be a queen or king for a day. There are many great spas in the city that offer half or full-day spa visits. When I need extra pampering, I like Novo Spa in Yorkville. If money is an issue, many spas offer their services separately at reasonable prices. There are countless nail shops all over the city that offer mani/pedi combo packages for as little at $30.00. While your nails dry, get various body parts shaped, plucked, and waxed. Still need more TLC? Slip into a hair salon (many take walk-ins) for a wash, trim and style.

Dog Day Afternoon

It’s quite possible that your dog is already benefiting of your current status. Why not treat you and your pooch to a day of fun. Imagine treating your best friend to a memorable day of butt sniffing and territory marking. Bundle up and head to off-leash parks in other neighbourhoods around the city. If you have a smaller dog that is sensitive to the cold and salt, take him on the subway and then walk through the vast underground PATH. You can walk for hours and you won’t have to worry about your little buddy getting frost bitten, sore paws or zapped on the streets above. From there, head down to PawsWay at Harbourfront Centre. PawsWay offers exhibits, events and interactive learning opportunities for pet owners. General Admission is free and dogs are welcome. Yes, seriously!

Let’s Get Physical, Physical

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It is the perfect time to join a gym and get moving. By now, most of the resolutionaries have disappeared, freeing up equipment, lockers and trainers. Working out a few times a week is not only great for your health but also your self-esteem. If you start now you will definitely see great results by spring. While you’re there, be sure to take advantage of the pool, sauna, steam room and whirlpool. Before making a commitment, check out various gyms in your area to find the perfect fit for you. Many gyms offer 3-day passes free of charge or at little cost.

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I suggest you bring a friend along on this adventure, especially one who can keep secrets. Start with a pint or two at a fun spot like Zelda’s in the Village. Then head over to Northbound Leather for a little mistress dress-up. You can pretend you are Kate Beckinsale in these beautifully-crafted leather and PVC works of art. Who knows, you might even find yourself whipping out your Visa. Don’t forget to venture to the back room. It’s a sight for bored eyes! After you’re done there saunter over to Seduction for a look-see. Be sure to buy yourself a little something special. Still not satisfied? Check out Remington’s

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on Sunday evenings for their ladies’ night. You’ll feel the love – well not love but close enough considering the circumstances.

A Party a Go-Go

Nothing beats the winter blues like dancing your ass off to funky electro and dirty house beats. When I am looking for a fun night out with friends, I like to go to The Social or Footwork hood of horror online . The vibe is great; the drinks are generous and reasonably priced. Both places are mid-sized, so you won’t have to deal with unpleasantries at the door or spend the night searching for your friends. You are guaranteed to make new friends without worrying about sweaty shirtless pervs grinding on your freshly waxed leg. Be sure to get on the guest list and save yourself a few bucks for a cocktail.